The Evolution of Change, as Recalled by an RSPer

Breaking Points

There was that time when I had accidentally broken three glasses, a window, and my car windshield all within a couple weeks of each other.

And the time I had to pull my car over on my way home from an event, then sat there sobbing uncontrollably for an hour.

Or the time I stood in my cubicle – everyone bustling around me – watching as if suspended from my body, realizing I had become a person I no longer recognized.

Separate moments, all resulting in the same realization… the only way I’d own my life would be by owning my company, with a deep pang in the center of my chest that knew I couldn’t wait any longer for someone else to decide.

My husband’s words, “It’s time,” were spoken with such obvious clarity, I wondered how I hadn’t already thought of it.

Donella Olson, Founder & RSPer Two Island Design Build, LLC

The reality was, I had been told that I was an Owner by anyone with no stake in the game, and by no one who held the cards. “You need to own the company,” they’d say.

“I don’t want all the risk,” I’d reply. I’m not ready. I need to learn more. If I work hard, put in the time, prove my worth… I’ll make them see, I’ll change their mind, I’ll get my dues.

That kind of big future is for other people, not for me.  And certainly not right now.

It’s Long Past Time

I had been working hard, wasting a decade… waiting for the illusive permission that I never needed from anyone but myself. A combination of relief and regret; relief that I no longer had to prove myself, and regret that I had waited so long to bet on myself.

I’m a fixer. I’m a stay-too-longer. I’m a gotta-make-this-worker.  But the only constant in that sad story is me. I reminded myself that I don’t do regrets, and I don’t dwell. I learn and I grow.  It was time to fix me, to get dedicated to my own mission, to align with my own values. To invest my heart and soul and grit and risk… in me.

Everything in my being told me I had to – there was no alternative I could stomach.

So I started. Anxious. Unknowing. Hopeful. Supported by all those who knew it was inevitable before I could see it myself. There were outpourings of congratulations. New community forming around me – the people who Own and let you in when you Own too. Referrals came immediately. Incredible new and past clients gave five-star reviews, told their friends, and came back for more projects… again and again.

I first realized I was succeeding when I had to pay income tax. Like, a lot of income tax.

See More, Be More

The most surprising part is the realization that I’m not just an owner of a company. I am an entrepreneur. I know now that I always have been. Being around other entrepreneurs has unlocked a barrier of limitation that I never realized I had imposed on myself. There’s a whole world of possibility that I now see is mine to experiment. There’s urgency and possibility that I never would have claimed before. There’s community and energy and synergy that my need for permission and self-imposed limitations never allowed me to see.

I know from the feeling in every inch of my bones that this is the only place I’m meant to be, even on bad days. Oh yes, there are bad days. Bad months. Heck, everything says I’m in a bad year. Still, I know what I’m doing is right – not just for me, but for everyone this will impact.

I do have some resentment towards my current business growth limitations. But it’s fleeting. A growing pain. It’s a sign of increasing opportunities. I can see past it, and I like what I see.

Thing is, there’s no finish line for me. The real goal is the luxury of freedom.

Freedom of time, thought, expansion, investment, and reflection.

Freedom of opportunity.

Before, I never allowed myself to dream of financial and emotional freedom. I’m no longer limited by the worth imposed on me by others or a work culture created by others.

There’s No Shame in Wanting More

You already have it within you to enact the change you want to see in your life. The only limitation is your own desire and willingness to do the work.

People say to me “I could never do that.” To which I reply, yes you can. It sounds cliché, but you can do anything you decide to do. The key is you need to want it. And you need to be willing to do the work.

And listen, there will be some heavy lifts. Some long, lonely hours. Grueling tasks. But the real work is on yourself. If you want change in your life, identify that thing inside you that holds you back, find the change… then practice it, live it, embody it. Be that change until it’s no longer a change. It’s just who you are.

Your choices are crystal clear: Stay the same or be your change.

The question is not “can I afford to change?” The question is “can I afford to stay the same?”

Find Your People

I leaned in to my support systems. Where they were lacking, I built new ones. I continue to build them.  Every time I find a new really cool person, it reinforces my belief that there are so many more cool people out there to meet.

There is an endless reservoir of people who can’t wait to see you succeed and want to do everything they can to help you.  Most of them, you haven’t even found yet.

Go.  Find them.

I have met some of the most supportive, encouraging, and genuinely real people at RSP events. Sure sure… this is an RSP blog, but I’m not just saying this because of the connection.

It is incredible how many amazing women have rallied around the Ready Set Pivot mission. Someone recently said to me (paraphrasing), if you are within Wendy’s orbit, it’s because you mean business. And those who are uncomfortable with owning their change will probably keep some distance from RSP.

That person could not be more correct… and I am eternally grateful for that.

Sure, you’ll network. You’ll make beneficial connections that help you get from here to there. But more meaningfully… expect to take responsibility for your own change. That means what’s inside you, not just where you’re going next. Because the only constant in your story is you… and all that shit you don’t fix will just follow you anyway.

Do the work.  Be the change.  Bet on yourself.  Take the leap.  Find your freedom.